We, the members of Girlfriends Association of Nigeria(GAN) have observed that our Boyfriends have embarked on the strike proposed by the Boyfriends Association of Nigeria(BAN). Our Boyfriends have relinquished their responsibilities, a childish move.
It is highly regrettable that our cherished and beloved Boyfriends, people who will suffered for, people who will sacrificed for.....have decided to follow this path.
Some of our boyfriends have cancelled their Traditional marriages and introductions, Some of our Boyfriends have come up with bizarre excuses such as "I am building a house in the village", "I am the sole sponsor to my sister's wedding", "I want to buy a car for my Mum", "I bought some plots of Land" e.t.c.
For Christ sake, we are not stopping you guys from spending on your Families.
You can't slap your child and expect Her not to cry. Our boyfriends have slapped Us and we are crying.
An emergency meeting was held today at High-Level Hotel, Mubi, Adamawa state...under tight security.
The following resolutions were reached with simple majority;
1. That since our boyfriends have relinquished their responsibilities, we have entered a contractual agreement with the Sugar Daddies Association of Nigeria(SUDAN).
2. That the agreement will last till June 2013.
3. That since most of our boyfriends are students and poor, members of SUDAN have promised to spoil us with money. They said houses and expensive cars will be presented as gifts this Yuletide period.
4. That since Sugar Daddies are apparent lazy in bed, as they only prefer Blowjobs and Cow-girl style...it is highly preferable to our boyfriends who loves blowjobs, doggy, scissor, standing, mosquito, and coconut styles.
5. That we have observed that some of the members of SUDAN are divorcees, and some members of GAN may buy the idea of getting married to some Sugar Daddies.
6. That the President of GAN should plead with our Mothers, the Sugar Mummies Association of Nigeria(SUMAN) to cut all forms of relationship with some of our estranged boyfriends.
7. That during this agreement with SUDAN, we will halt all forms of communication with our boyfriends.
8. That the B.A.N is given 48hours to stop their purported strike, and resume full boyfriend responsibilities.
9. That if our boyfriends fail to reply within the said time, we will start accepting gifts from Sugar Daddies and cooperating with them.
10. That a Memorandum of Understanding(MOU) calling to an end of the strike, be duly signed by our Legal adviser and the President of B.A.N, and also made public.
11. That since it has been proven that the illness, Congi-nitis(lack of sex) leads to loss of memory and brain damage, we assumed that the decision of BAN to embark on a two-month strike was ill-advised.
Felicia Akpors (Legal Adviser).
This is getting worse than first thought, i'd better reconsile with my girlfriend before she go for Sugar Daddy.....lol
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